Today’s episode is less of an interview, and more like listening to a relatable conversation between two parents frankly discussing how important it is for spouses or partners to be on the same page when raising a child with learning differences.
Gayle:
Today I am sharing a conversation between two Noble parents – a conversation that I found so relatable not just as an educator, not just as a mom, but as a wife. This couple has been married for 25 years, and when you listen to them today, their conversation might bring a quote to your mind, as it did to mine. That quote comes from wedding vows. You know the line, for better or for worse, in sickness and health. This mother and father decided, like quite a few Noble families before them, to relocate from their home, because their son had some learning differences. He also had some medical challenges. Now that they are having a very rewarding year at Noble Academy, and now with almost a school year behind them, they know they made the right choice, but that does not mean it was easy. Here is a glimpse into their story. I think you’ll find it as relatable as I did.
Mother:
…Just thinking back to his entireacademic career so far, I think we were able to find out early on that he would need help with along the way, even starting in first grade when we first moved to Florida Right. From Colorado. And, I think the teachers there were a good fit for what he had at that time, but it kinda gave us a glimmer of things to come.
And then when we moved to Georgia a year or so later, we went to public school, for a year, we definitely felt like that was not a good fit.
And, you know, even with the challenges that he had, he didn't, qualify for an IEP
Right. Which was very difficult, I think, for him and so forth. So we were really blessed to find a smaller private school that we were able to get him into with some breakout classes for additional help for learning support for some of the subjects that he needed help with with math and English. And that worked really well until COVID, and then things kinda went sideways, I think, from there.
Father:
I believe that’s when you had talked to your sister, and that's when we found out about the Noble up here in North Carolina through a friend of your sisters.
Mother:
Yeah. We were really fortunate. She introduced us to Kara Davenport, whose son went here and was graduating last year. And, she really helped us embrace the Noble options, and then we were able to set up a tour. And I just remember when we walked through the doors, I knew this is where he needed to be.
Yes, I think that he was so comfortable just from even the tour. I've not seen him that comfortable with an educational environment in probably close to a year. I think, you know, we had some setbacks with COVID. And then with the move that we had to do, to Florida, it definitely set him up in some more challenging environments in the school that we found, but it allowed us to get some diagnosis, uncovered and some more testing done for him to see what he really needed. And I think all that was very challenging for him. So, I remember when he was done with his two days here, doing his, you know, his shadowing and so forth and testing to see if it would be a good fit, he walked up to the receptionist on the way out and said, thank you for letting me come. And I really wanna go to school here, which just brought it all home to me knowing that I felt that way when we walked in and when we were walking out. Two days later, he felt the same way.
Father:
And, you know, I think God helped us, you know, make the choice and end up here. And I think as a family, we were pretty content on that and, set on it once he was up here and you had made the trips up here.
Mother:
We prayed a lot about it and the path was pretty much shown to us, including his education stuff and some medical stuff that came up along the way that brought us closer to some of the large children's hospitals up here. It all worked out and came together well.
Father:
With the change in the move we had to make, how did you feel about having to sever working relationships, if you will, down in Florida to make the journey back up here to North Carolina.
Mother:
You know, I think for me personally, taking the mom piece out of it, that was probably the most difficult part because I had signed up to be the leader of the department to re-verify our trauma center. And I've been with the company for so long that, you know, there's certain expectations there from the previous places that I've done this. And so, to have to walk in and tell my boss, the chief operating officer, that I have to leave to go to another state to handle our personal business.
That was probably one of the most challenging personal professional things I've had to do in my career as a nurse and nurse leader. So I think, you know, I'm grateful that they gave me the opportunity to continue on remotely to help through the survey and help support with the transition to the other leader, that's there now. And I think, you know, just it was I was grateful to have the opportunity to shift to something that was remote so that we could make all the changes and go through all the medical things that we had to do without it totally impacting my career. But I think that just it was a big shift to go from leading a team in a, you know, twenty four seven environment with very big expectations to working from home and just managing everything else, but it was necessary. And, you know, it's still very fulfilling.
It's just fulfilling in a different way.
Father:
I remember when you were going through those decisions and how tough they were for you.
Mother:
Yep. They were absolutely worth it. So I think, with our move to Noble, it's been so amazing. I think the biggest difference obviously are – this school caters to children with learning differences… I appreciate the level of accountability that they're putting into the students, to have their own accountability as a student for their learning and for their responsibilities and just the way they're helping them organize and learn this, especially he's, you know, in this freshman year that he's in at this point. I think it'll help build him up quicker than he would have in another situation or another school setting where we've been in previously.
Father:
Well, and every time we've been here I've been here. We were here the other night. Everyone knows him by name, which is, I think, a big thing.
Mother:
So I think one of the things he was most excited about this year was becoming class president. He really thought that that was a really big accomplishment for him because he'd run for it before at some of the previous schools and hadn't been chosen.
And so I think it opened some doors for him to start some relationship building early on in the school year, and that's kind of grown as they've gotten to know each other throughout the year just in classes and so forth. And he's enjoying time to go into the y after school with some of the kids in the class, and he's loved going to the dances that we have and all the activities and, even the field trip the other day to the basketball game. He just thought that was great.
Father:
Absolutely. And he's starting to bring names home, of friends and classes.
And, Gabe is his buddy, right now. And, hopefully, Gabe will bring him into some sports. And, but, yeah, definitely, last year, there weren't many names coming home at the previous school, and I think that was just the all around atmosphere of the school. So I think, I'm sure he has more friends than names that we have at this point, but he enjoys coming to school.
Mother:
What do you think the biggest changes you've seen with him have been since we've made this transition and move, as averse to the other moves that we'd made previously to other schools?
Father:
Well, with this move, I think his mentality overall has changed since coming back to North Carolina, especially with his volunteer work at the Science Center. So he has taken that on as a responsibility.
Father:
Do you see anything, as a family we could have done to maybe succeed or change things earlier in his education?
Mother:
I honestly think that he had just enough help in the previous grades at that smaller school in Georgia, in those breakout classes that it actually hid some of the issues that came out when we made the move to Florida. I don't think we would have identified them as quickly or the same way.
There was definitely a difference in the learning environments and the fact that there wasn't the support that we thought was at the school that we moved to. Right. So I think I think we came to it how we were supposed to come to it, even though some days that feels challenging that we couldn't identify it faster. But I think with all of the changes that happened in the last several years with what just everybody went through with education in general, with having to stop things with COVID and just the help and the support that we had at the previous school before the Florida move. I think it just masked what we couldn't identify, basically, and it kind of helped them along just enough to make it work, but then it just kind of all fell apart after the move. So I think no. I think we're exactly where we're supposed to be when we're supposed to be here.
Father:
I agree. And we talked about it, you know, coming over and we talk about it all the time.
The Florida stent, how short it was, had to be done for school and for a couple of the medical things. And, I think God's got us in the right place now.
Mother:
Absolutely.
I think the only thing that I think that is worth mentioning that we haven't talked about is that when you have a child with learning differences, it's important to keep an open mind with exploring what those are early on and repetitively because they change over time sometimes. And we've certainly seen his language skills evolve as he's grown up, and some things were easier to identify the more his language skills grew and the more he was able to participate in testing and stuff. So I think even if it doesn't seem right in the lower grades or sometimes there's a tipping point in middle school to high school that it's worth looking at and exploring the options for schools like Noble that have an exceptional opportunity for them to have a different course than being put in a classroom with 30 children where they're lost and pulled out for, you know, class times that and then put back in where they may not be as successful. And, honestly, I'm just grateful that he has the opportunity to be here.
I think it'll make a very big difference in the long run for him both professionally and personally as he grows.
Father:
It has definitely helped us, our son and our family.
Mother:
I mean, I think there are things like this in life that pull you apart if you don't decide to figure it out together. We definitely, I mean we've been married twenty six going on twenty six years this year. And, I think it's definitely been a partnership, but there's definitely been some moments that were challenging. And I think just accepting all these things, you know, it is we all just had to come to it our own way, I think, because everybody comes with their predisposed notions and your own academic experiences and your own health experiences. And then, you know, we had to kinda meet in the middle with what you know, we agreed when in the beginning that we were gonna move forward together with it.
Gayle:
I want to thank my guests today for being so authentic. Like teaching, parenting is hard work that is deeply rewarding, and most successful when it involves teamwork. Noble Academy educators understand that, and we are so glad when we can partner with families so that our students thrive both at school AND at home.